Rants & Reflections

Sunscreen

40 is the new 30.

Anyone else, find that statement ridiculous?   Before people jump on the positive thinking bandwagon, hear me out.

When I turned 30, no one told me, that it was the new 20!  Why?  Because it wasn’t.  No positive mental attitude, was going to make a 30 year old 20.  In mind, body, spirit, experience and job prospects you are 30 – Deal with it!

I’m far from 30 now.  I’m fast approaching 40 and if someone said to me “Deal with it’’, I think they would be having something surgically removed from their colon!

So what’s the best approach?  As always, a kind one.  Honest, realistic but always kind.

I may not be thrilled at turning 40 but lets keep it upbeat… where possible.  I don’t want to be 30 again.  I am quite happy in my 30-something bubble.  Is there a pause button?

I am feeling a little overwhelmed, if I’m honest and a bit lost.  Last time I felt like this, I was listening to this song:

‘Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’99

Wear Sunscreen

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, Sunscreen would be it.  The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience…

I will dispense this advice now…

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.  oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.  But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked…

You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.  The real troubles in your life, are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind.  The kind that blindside you, at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you.

Sing

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts; don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss

Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind.  The race is long and in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults, if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.  Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch

Don’t feel guilty, if you don’t know what you want to do with your life.  The most interesting people I know didn’t know, at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium.  Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary.  

Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either; your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can.  Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.  Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.  Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good.  Be nice to your siblings, they are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few, you should hold on.  Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.  Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel

Accept certain inalienable truths; prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do; you’ll fantasize; that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders

Don’t expect anyone else to support you.  Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse but you never know, when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time you’re 40, it will look 85.  Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it.  Advice is a form of nostalgia; dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen’

Author – Mary Schmich – Baz Luhrmann Version

I was 21 years old.  It was 1999.  I was a little overwhelmed and a bit lost.

My life has changed so much since then but that feeling still remains.  The lyrics of this song, resonate with me still.  So very accurate.  Painfully true in parts, I can’t help but smile.  Painfully wrong in others, that I blink back the tears.

There is something about milestone birthdays, that make me evaluate what I have and realise what I don’t.  It’s like looking at the worst kind of management report ever.  The data that has been collected, by my brain, is now awaiting my perusal.  It’s in chronological order, punctuated with emotional twists and turns and quite a thorough account.

I am one of the first, to be stumbling across the 40s threshold, in my ‘group’.  I am not kicking and screaming.  I am not confidently walking over that fucker, listening to ‘Age Ain’t Nothing but a Number’ either.  So where am I? What am I doing?  How do I feel?

I don’t know.  I’m a little overwhelmed and still lost.

I am all over that sunscreen, that is now an all year round staple.  Hardly 19 years of solid progress but definitely 19 years of experience.  The days are long but the years are short. ‘The race is long and in the end,  it’s only with yourself’.

Looking back is nostalgic.  If getting to this milestone and still not having a clue what I am doing, makes me interesting – I will take that.  I will take that and forward march across this new threshold.  I want to think of this as a new chapter.  If every day can be a new start, then imagine what a milestone birthday can be.  

If I am not mistaken, I think I have just heard, my own positive mental attitude talking.  I am not 20 or 30.  I am days away from 40 and that’s just fine by me!

 

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