I love my toddler daughter so very much and even her tantrums, have been a welcome distraction lately. I can’t be an emotional wreck 24/7 when I have a child. Even at my weakest, my girls needs, have flipped my ‘Sack Up’ switch and I get on with it.
She keeps me busy and my brain occupied. I am Mummy 7 til 7, then I can be a mess if I need too.
I have definitely been cashing in that chip lately. Husband comes home and puts our girl to bed, while I cook dinner, with a glass of plonk in hand. The week that followed my Grandads passing, I was drinking a bottle of wine a night. To sleep, to chill, to accompany my Youtube journey, through Nat King Cole, Frank Sinatra and Johnny Mathis.
However as wistful as that sounds, I wake up to the aftermath of my choices. Eyes practically swollen shut, epic headache and a toddler with only one volume setting…loud. I have been in this cycle for two weeks now. The results of my new routine are;
- An impressive recollection of lyrics
- A daily headache and dehydration issue
- Rather unattractive wine fat
I was happily under the illusion, that I could continue this delightful diet, for as long as I needed too. I don’t smoke or take any drugs, it’s just wine right?
I’m not exactly at pre-pregnancy weight but I was still shocked at my new extra pounds. I pulled on my first pair of leggings and teamed it with a baggy top, to hide my blossoming tyre. I looked great!!
No dumbass! You have concealed your wine fat!
I then proceeded to don a pair of flip flops and head to the shops. I was standing at the checkout, with my daughter in her buggy. A cashier kindly processed my items, which included, a half eaten pack of Fig Rolls. Oh my God! In the reflection of the shop window, I saw my Mum. I saw a very mumsy woman…I saw me.
Fuck no. Sorry not happening!
I’m grieving a loss but I’m not going to lose myself. I love my wine so I need to find a way to co-exist with it, in a healthy way. I know it’s possible, without having to become a card carrying member, of the Asparagus and Avocado club.
They may be fashionable. They may be cool. They may be superfoods but they taste vile. I would rather have a fried egg.
Oooooo fried egg…