Today had one important thing going for it. 90 minutes of child free time. I’m so excited!!! Basically my mum looks after my daughter while I go for a bikini wax – a break is a break! I drive there, get the carpet replaced with hardwood floors and drive back. Wonderful. It’s the one break I get every month so I enjoy every delicious painful second of it.
Getting myself and my little girl ready in the morning is a mission. I have to wake up at the crack of dawn and get ready while she sleeps then I can move on to her. The milk, the jars, the snacks, the clothes, nappies, wipes, multiple dummies, toys, bibs, muslin cloths and the just-in-case-Calpol. All essential items and all loaded into the changing bag. I’m functioning on autopilot. I was almost ready when she woke up so we were making good time. This was positive…
Her bag, my bag, the car seat and us were now in the car and on the road. We were bang on schedule and heading to mums. At this point my autopilot switched off and I was just starting to relax… Car radio loud, windows down, sun on my arm… Shit! I forgot to put my waxing knickers on! In fact, I didn’t put any knickers on! There was no time to go back for my pants now. It’s time to remain calm and embrace my wardrobe choice of the faithful maxi skirt.
My 90 minutes of freedom went by in a flash (!!). Before long I was back at home opening the mail. In the post today was a tax bill, apparently I didn’t pay enough tax 2 years ago. Terrific. Wish they had told me when I was earning so I could actually do something about it. The ways to pay are:
- Pay in full using the enclosed slip
- Arrange a monthly payment plan
- Have this amount collected (£220) via your tax code.
Perfectly reasonable. I will wait for my non-existent payday and settle my bill with my invisible wages. Or maybe raid my imaginary savings account. Looks like the poor bank of husband will have to rescue me again.
It had been a difficult parenting day also. Constant whining and fidgeting, my little girl was irritated whatever I tried. Only quiet when in my arms. She even has to sit on my lap when I use the toilet now. I must have skipped this mortifying chapter in my copy of What to Expect when you’re Expecting! Today I reached a new level of grim I never thought was possible…
I would like to say that I was able to finish my visit to the toilet. I would like to say that I had chance to wipe and leave with my dignity intact. I would like to say that I didn’t have to leave the loo earlier than planned and take my delightful cherub downstairs to her high chair so she can be entertained with a packet of wet wipes (the latest source of amusement). I would like to say a lot of things. Today is just not that day. That said, the lack of knickers at this point was handy.
At 6pm, there was another two hours to go before my husband got home. There was washing in the machine, dinner to cook, a pathway, at the very least, to be cleared in the lounge and a cold cup of tea to put back in the microwave. I really don’t have this together. I have stopped talking about it to other people as the barrage of ‘have you tried…’ just pushes me over the edge. Reply to all – YES I HAVE! Thanks for your input!
The day finally ended at 11:30pm. My daughter finally gave into sleep and my weary husband and I hugged in the hallway wondering what the hell went wrong and went to bed. We were up again at 3am and 6am but hey, that’s technically another day.