There are many definitions of a best friend:
- Someone whose friendship you value above all others
- The first person you call with good news or bad
- The first person you call to make plans
- The person you share everything with
- The friend who is practically part of your family
Most people have one true best friend. These relationships are usually formed at school, college or work. Some bonds are formed, between people, going through similar experiences. Some form purely as a result of geography, living next door or growing up in the same street. When I was growing up, it was common, to have one best friend. Today, it is considered the norm, to have a circle of best friends.
I am very lucky. I have a small circle of really great friends. However, there is a little sting in the tail at times. All these amazing women have best friends. I’m just additional support as and when. I’m the 2nd call they make, still valued and important but second.
At the risk of sounding like a brat – I don’t have a best friend. I have inadvertently, become part of an elite troubleshooting team. When the BFF drops the ball, I receive a call. It’s an odd but privileged position.
I have had 3 best friends in my lifetime but as with so much in life, things change. My first best friend is still a very important part of my life. My second best friend was a heartbreaking casualty of my first marriage. My third is currently a bridge being rebuilt. I love her. I miss her. It’s a journey that we are both still on, so who knows.
I hold my friends dear, in part, because my family are difficult, cold and wired wrong. Over time, my friends have formed the family I always wanted. All my little sisters, big brother’s and work mums, mean everything to me. They may not be there, at the exact moment you want them but they are always right on time.
Just this morning, I was having an emotional overwhelmed-mum moment. I put all my drama, into an epic WhatsApp message to one of my closest friends. I just had to get it all out there. I felt better, just telling her what was in my head. With her busy day job, there is usually a few hours, between messages. Today was different. I was sobbing in my kitchen, completely broken and exhausted, when my phone went. She was there. She had managed to steal a few moments to read all my crazy. Her calm rationale, put me back on my track, for the rest of the day. She knew just what to say, right on time.