Rants & Reflections

Weirdly Hopeful

Now I’m back working in retail, I see a delightful cross-section of the populace on a daily basis.  Even the most difficult amongst our clientele, make me smile. 

Having lived in a little bubble of being a stay at home mum for 7 years, I am now back mixing with the human race and they are an interesting bunch.  Just yesterday as I was packing my customers’ pajamas into a bag she blurted out.

“My husband keeps asking me if he is ever going to see me naked? – I tell him – not likely!” 

She was laughing but I know she was dead serious.  Another lady who had clearly not planned on treating herself, heaped her purchases onto the counter and said,

“I’m not a big spender but today I thought f*ck it!”.  Well ok then.

From casual pleasantries to life stories, I get them all.  A customer last week, felt so at ease that she showed me her appendectomy scar, in the middle of the store.  What started as a innocent conversation about swimwear, became a very personal discussion about clothing suitable for those of us with scars.  Knee and hip replacements, C Sections, hysterectomies, all leave their mark but no matter how old we get, I now understand that we all like to feel confident and dare I say it…sexy.

Most of the customers I see are chatty, interesting and funny.  Some are already annoyed, tapping their nails on the counter or tutting when kept waiting.  The “I’ve got a bus to catch” line is used a lot.  I do my best to support my fellow bus users but from all my retail buddies out there I would just like to say;

Dearest Customers. 

We love you and enjoy you visiting us.  That said, if you are too busy to shop, then perhaps leave it for another day.  We also have lives, stress and buses to catch.  Be kind. 

All the very best

Your hard working, minimum wage earning, humble Sales Colleague

I’m getting to know my customers now, some seek me out, one lady knows my first name and calls to me.  Every time it happens, I look around for my mum expecting a telling off, only to see the sweet smile of customer laughing at her own cheekiness.  There are the same annoying aspects of retail that are still there decades on.  The endless floor moves, seasonal sales and incentives that we are required to push at every transaction to meet targets.  Not all staff get on 100% of the time.  There are huge chunks of the year that we are forbidden to book holiday but all in all, I’m happy – I think. 

A lady approached me at the till recently and asked me if I had Bells Palsy.  Bells Palsy is “a temporary weakness or lack of movement that usually affects one side of the face”.  Now I am used to people being confused by my appearance and often wanting to take a crack at the reason behind it.  I confirmed that I didn’t and that my condition was congenital.  She continued to share that she had bells palsy at one time and had since made a full recovery.

“If it was Bells Palsy, I wanted to give you some hope”  she went on to say.

My response was more hurtful than I had anticipated. “Oh that’s very kind but unfortunately there is no hope for me”.

We wrapped up our encounter and as she left, my words still floated in the air.  No hope?  I will never be fixed and a full recovery for me is not possible so I was accurate in my assessment but the no hope part, that was jarring.  Do I really feel like that about my appearance or indeed any aspect of my situation?  Part of me must do.  Those words tumbled out way too fast for it to have been a mistake.

There are bad days I will admit, those days can get pretty dark but for the most part, I’m weirdly hopeful.  Not for a symmetrical, fully functioning face, although that would be pretty cool.  Not for a cure for blindness, as I know that will not happen in my lifetime but I’m hopeful that regardless of what happens to me,  I will be okay.

I’m weirdly hopeful that even with my unfairly stacked odds, it’s gonna be alright. 

Just in case, you had a day like mine, here is a great spin on a timeless classic.

It’s Gonna be a Lovely Day – The Secret Life of Pets 2 – LunchMoney Lewis Featuring Aminé

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